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The picture is of the Cedar Creek Grist Mill, located in Clark County, Washington.

Tuesday, Oct. 9, 2018

Recently, I watched a movie titled “Remember Sunday” and really enjoyed it.  Felt I could really relate to the main character and his troubles.  Not quite sure I could explain this to someone else though.  Don’t want to spoil the movie for anyone who might decide to watch it, so will not say any more about it.  

I had yet another appointment with my doctor regarding the medicine for ADHD.  She had no answers as to why the medicine isn’t working as expected.  So, she just upped the dosage, hoping for even a slight improvement.  Seems that’s the answer most often.  The medicine for depression that I take also isn’t working.  I’ve thought about upping that myself, as I have some left that are lower mg than what I take each day.  Instead, if I can remember, I’ll message the doctor and ask about it.  Must admit, it is very difficult to be patient when taking medicine, and then an increased dosage, waiting, increasing dosage again, waiting, etc.  It’s also very expensive.  

A couple months ago or so I decided to check out a local brain injury support group.  Turns out the group was for brain injury and also stroke victims/survivors.  Most of those in attendance were people that had had a stroke.  It took a couple of times attending the meeting before I decided there wasn’t much I could contribute to the meeting or those attending.  So, stopped going.  A bunch of years ago there was a more meaningful group meeting that occurred once each month.  This group was only for those with brain injury and you had to apply to attend.  One of the main requirements was you had to be self sustaining, and of course a survivor of traumatic brain injury.  The facilitator was  a survivor who had to take early retirement due to the injury.  He had a PhD in physics and the retirement hit him pretty hard.  This group I enjoyed, as I felt I could participate and contribute more.  Sadly, the group has disbanded and no longer meets, and there are no other groups like it.  At least not in this geographical area.  

Some self observation…  This is nearly impossible to try and explain so that others will understand.  I’ve been living with a traumatic brain injury(and right eye blindness) for over 37 years.  It started 5 days after I turned 21 years of age.  I feel, in some respects, like I’m stuck at that point in life, with stronger and more memorable memories of that time of my life (the years prior to the TBI) than I have over the 37 years since then.  My memory of the years before the TBI are more vivid than any memories of my 17 year old daughters life.  This is a bit depressing.  No memory of when my daughter took her first steps, and I was with her when it happened(as just one example).  It would be interesting to hear a neuropsychologist try and explain this.